Jeevansandhya ....

Heard news on Child Protection act and some days back on Laws against Child abuse …

Children , they are so vulnerable … the other day while waiting in church for Esther’s Sunday school, happen to see 1 yr old child’s baptism ,,, the family had come down from US and the baby was not at all comfortable with the heat and the proceeding …. Mother looked in her early 30’s or late 20’s and was wearing a white Anarkali Salwaar .. throughout the ceremony the child was crying … me and my friends (all mothers )were feeling uncomfortable seeing the child crying , we thought baby will be fine after the ceremony ..

but to our surprise , he was changed to all covered kurta pyjama (adding to his discomfort) and instead of mother feeding him (or even bottle feeding was ok) a soother what ever is called was put into his mouth …. My friend a doctor seeing this commented “Children are so vulnerable “!! So very true … .. this is just a small example where adults for their convenience ignored the actual need of the child ….

 

Mary ...

2005 I moved to Hyderabad, after 1 - 1.5 years of break from IT I decided to join back an IT company , Esther was 8 months old , my office in Jubilee Hills , not sure how I will manage work and baby , took a house in Film Nagar , not very far, the next thing was to get a maid or baby sitter – My land lady told me that there is a “Basti” near by and many ladies come for house help she will pass on the message , and we will get somebody … for me this was new experience, till then I had never kept a maid or house help, so have no experience or idea of what to expect , how much they expect and all …. I am anxious and keep my finger crossed … Early morning somebody knocks the door and I see a young girl standing , she tells me that she was told that I was looking for a maid to take care of baby – I said yes I am looking … then she said she will do the job ! I am shocked and almost scream “What “ ! I call her in , looking at her I assume she must be in class 7-8 , .. I tell her “Tum to Bachi ho, meine tumhe kaam pe nahi rakh sakti , ye tumhare school jaane ki umr hai - ghar mein bada koi nahi hai kya ? Naam Kya hai tumhara?”

JeevanSandhya – Sandhya She is 13 yrs old 3 among 6children,class 7 drop out . dad a laborer , Mom a maid, eldest brother School drop out good for nothing working in a hotel, elder sister was working in some house , now at home, 2 younger siblings at home … they are from Karnatka/Andhra border basically farmers lot of land but no cultivation and hence moved to Hyderabad … I tell her to tell her mom to meet me … her mother comes in the evening … fragile simple soft spoken lady .. she tells me that to support family her children need to work ,.. I tell her I still can’t take Sandhya for work .. so the lady decides her elder daughter Mary will come for the job ..

Next day Mary and Sandhya both come .. Mary is around 16-17 year old – studied till class 10 … looks old and matured for her age … I tell her not worry about house hold work just take care of Esther .. the 1BHK house has nothing in it just a bedroll a small single stove gas very few utensils an Iron box and Esther’s and my clothes that’s it , nothing much to worry about .. but day 1 I am anxious – I leave my mobile number 10-20 Rs for Mary in case she needs to call me … afternoon I come home to check on and feed Esther … things looks in control … evening I walk along with Mary to drop her back home also get to know where she lives … Basti /Slum area near by 5-10 mins walk … there is Vegetable market … snacks shop and all .. .. I see her off also realize how difficult life is for her and her siblings …. and then next few days and weeks I see her younger brother and 2 sisters coming home, I don’t mind that … in the morning I buy some extra breakfast for Mary and her siblings … tell her to share with them … Esther gets comfortable with all of them ,…. Praveen and Sony,Pinky her younger bro and sis come home in the evening and I try to teach them English and maths … 

Seeing Praveen’s interest in study I told Mary to put him in school and I will pay the fees … I realized that I have to take him to school if he has to go .. so one Saturday I take him to school near the Basti , get him admission buy him school uniform and some books and pay fees for 3 months … talk to his teacher … he is taken in class 2 ,,, so far so good …then one day am late at office … by the time I reach back home its 8 pm and I don’t see Mary and Esther … I am all anxious … I run to the basti trying to find the way to Mary’s “kholi” … I am told they have shifted to a new Kholi … I am worried – somehow I find out the her place – I see Esther with mary’s parents and young brother and sisters .. laughing and running around (first look, dirty floor) but actually well kept kholi – just one room … and 7 people … then Mary’s mom tells that since it was getting late they got Esther and Mary home .. … then they offered me Bajre ki roti and Beef curry – I had dinner with them …. Realized have to learn from them to share what ever you have and have some faith /trust in people … But I am alone with Esther in Hyderabad … Anil in Bangalore , alternate week I travel to bangalore in bus with Esther … tiring .. and though I keep myself busy , when alone at home with Esther I miss Anil and being in Bangalore.. Once in a while Mary’s mother comes home in the evening … sees her children studying and playing with Esther … she tells me … Poor people should not have more kids, if you (I)have more kids , they will have good life … what life can a poor parents give to their children …. And tells how she had no option of family planning … 

Decided to go back to Bangalore .. but then what about Mary and her brothers and sisters … while I am job hunting , Mary tells that she might be going to Bombay to her uncle’s place … some job offer … I was sad … Bombay , job for Mary … wish I could do something for Mary … after 4 months in Hyderabad I got a job offer for Bangalore … … Mary’s mom candidly says if I could take one of her daughter along with me , guess she felt it was safe being with me . I actually wanted to do that , take her little one Pinky 5 yrs old with me , wanted to adopt her … but I didn’t have the courage to take that responsibility then ….. 27 yr old trying to balance career and family life was not sure if I could take the responsibility of Pinky ….. the day I left Hyderabad, gave my clothes and quite a few stuff to Mary , gave her parents extra money for school fees …. Wonder where are the children now … I hope Mary’s parents went back to their village and started farming, I hope Mary and her brothers and Sisters are safe … I hope Life is treating them fine …..