Thursday, January 22, 2015

Moving On - Sumitra


Sumitra – in her mid 20s , expert in her technical field. She was technical consultant in one of my projects in Trivandrum and I was not sure if her inclusion in team would make some of the guys insecure, for she was younger than most of the team members and was suppose to review their work. My first meeting with her , I told her about the project in brief and the team in little detail, and introduced her to the team. She was little conscious/cautious meeting with the team, and soon I realised, she was very level headed and took everybody along , and I was lucky to have her in the team. The project was very stressful and hectic and Sumitra who’s base location was Banglore (which was my concern , as people get homesick and want to go back as early as possible) used to  travel once in a while to Bangalore during weekends.


In the months that followed I observed her trip home had reduced and since everybody was working long hours and many a time on weekends , I knew the reason. Inspite of all the tight schedules one thing which we used to do as team was to celebrate B’day of team members, usually Ice creams and juice party – and it was during one of these celebration I happened to talk to Sumitra (we were the only Women in the team) , casually I asked about her family and was surprised that she was married, her husband also in IT company in Bangalore had gone out for a onsite assignment and hence she decided to take the consulting project in Trivandrum. Nice I thought . The project went on for few more months and we all moved to our next projects.

We used to meet once in while and then I asked her, ‘you not going back to Bangalore, your husband not yet back ?’  And then she told ‘We are in the process of separation, and I being here is conscious effort in keeping distance ‘ A little shocked but then I managed to say, hope you will get over it soon. And guess I realised probably I was the first person at work place she was talking about it – and then we decided to talk over tea … Hers was an arranged marriage hardly 1 year old, and the guy was about same age as hers – she was definitely very matured,brilliant and level headed for her age and I could guess the compatibility problems both of them could have faced … I did not probe too much into it and she did the brief talking , the only saving grace in the whole thing was her parents were supportive .

Next 6-7 months I did not have much contact with Sumitra, and then one day while getting out of  the elevator, I heard a familiar sound calling me – that was Sumitra ‘Hey Simmi, finally got to see you, today is my last day at work here, I am joining a company at Bangalore’ I was surprised and happy and had questions in my head which I guessed she understood and she added ‘ All the legal formalities were completed few months back and officially I am single :)’ That’s when I felt really happy for her and told her ‘Enjoy and live your life, and (with a naughty smile and a wink I added) don’t think of getting hooked too soon again‘ . The next she did was to hug me and say ‘Will miss you at work’ and I promptly telling ‘You will miss better things in life if you waste your thoughts and time missing me ;) ‘

Sumitra doing great in her professional life, and I guess not so bad in her personal life too … and knowing her was for me getting little more mature and sensitive to people around , to accept that I should not be too judgmental (especially of their personal choice and life) about people around , probably people much younger to me have gone through much more difficulties in life …..


You see, some things I can teach you. Some you learn from books. But there are things that, well, you have to see and feel.” 

 Khaled Hosseini, A Thousand Splendid Suns

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