Sumitra – in her mid 20s , expert in her
technical field. She was technical consultant in one of my projects in
Trivandrum and I was not sure if her inclusion in team would make some of the
guys insecure, for she was younger than most of the team members and was
suppose to review their work. My first meeting with her , I told her about the
project in brief and the team in little detail, and introduced her to the team.
She was little conscious/cautious meeting with the team, and soon I realised, she was
very level headed and took everybody along , and I was lucky to have her in the
team. The project was very stressful and hectic and Sumitra who’s base location
was Banglore (which was my concern , as people get homesick and want to go back
as early as possible) used to travel
once in a while to Bangalore during weekends.
In the months that followed I observed her
trip home had reduced and since everybody was working long hours and many a time
on weekends , I knew the reason. Inspite of all the tight schedules one thing
which we used to do as team was to celebrate B’day of team members, usually Ice
creams and juice party – and it was during one of these celebration I happened
to talk to Sumitra (we were the only Women in the team) , casually I asked
about her family and was surprised that she was married, her husband also in IT
company in Bangalore had gone out for a onsite assignment and hence she decided
to take the consulting project in Trivandrum. Nice I thought . The project went
on for few more months and we all moved to our next projects.
We used to meet once in while and then I
asked her, ‘you not going back to Bangalore, your husband not yet back ?’ And then she told ‘We are in the process of
separation, and I being here is conscious effort in keeping distance ‘ A little
shocked but then I managed to say, hope you will get over it soon. And guess I
realised probably I was the first person at work place she was talking about it
– and then we decided to talk over tea … Hers was an arranged marriage hardly 1
year old, and the guy was about same age as hers – she was definitely very
matured,brilliant and level headed for her age and I could guess the
compatibility problems both of them could have faced … I did not probe too much
into it and she did the brief talking , the only saving grace in the whole
thing was her parents were supportive .
Next 6-7 months I did not have much contact
with Sumitra, and then one day while getting out of the elevator, I heard a familiar sound
calling me – that was Sumitra ‘Hey Simmi, finally got to see you, today is my
last day at work here, I am joining a company at Bangalore’ I was surprised and
happy and had questions in my head which I guessed she understood and she added ‘
All the legal formalities were completed few months back and officially I am
single :)’ That’s when I felt really happy for her and told her ‘Enjoy and live
your life, and (with a naughty smile and a wink I added) don’t think of getting
hooked too soon again‘ . The next she did was to hug me and say ‘Will miss you
at work’ and I promptly telling ‘You will miss better things in life if you
waste your thoughts and time missing me ;) ‘
Sumitra doing great in her professional
life, and I guess not so bad in her personal life too … and knowing her was for
me getting little more mature and sensitive to people around , to accept that
I should not be too judgmental (especially of their personal choice and life) about
people around , probably people much younger to me have gone through much more
difficulties in life …..
You see, some things I can teach you. Some you
learn from books. But there are things that, well, you have to see and feel.”
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